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#WFH What’s Up With the Anger and Fear?

Fear is the biggest obstacle to personal change. Overcoming fear is just being human. There are a lot of good reasons we have fears, but unnecessary fear causes problems in your life and is something you might want to address. When you are alone in the virtual environment, unnecessary fears can wreak havoc in your life. Before you can take steps to change them, you want to identify them and then take action. Some of these fears are so deeply entrenched into your subconscious that you believe they are facts.

The most common fear in humans is the fear of loss of love, or abandonment. Fear, not love, causes a great deal of doing and manipulating. These beliefs and entrenched subconscious patterns can go back to childhood. But if we are aware and willing to work, we can change them. Early in life, we may have learned that if we did not perform in certain ways, parents or people you depended on withdrew love. This sets up a pattern of doing or giving with resentment. So we give in to someone’s requests or desires, and then feel like the victim. We resist being lonely and want to win over someone’s love and affection or acceptance. When we don’t, we see it as withdrawing love and support.

Anger is another common form of resistance to change. Some people can’t tolerate someone else being upset with them. They look at it as a loss of love or abandonment. Other people hold on to their own anger because it gives them a sense of power and control. If they can’t have what they want, at least they can have their anger. Anger usually causes stress; stress causes a whole range of undesirable conditions. It can pull virtual workers off task and out of flow, wasting time. If you respond with anger consistently, you are probably not focused on your priorities. After all, they are your priorities, not something you “have” to do. You will find yourself missing deadlines, becoming more frustrated and wasting a lot of time. If you have trouble staying on task and have too many diversions to take action on your priorities, you might want to examine the anger you feel.

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